me on this earth in the universe
me on this earth in the universe
i try everything on this earth as long as i live.literally anything.like a bungee jump or wandering around the world for yrs or surfing or swimming in the sea or climbing mountains trekking or doing the casino etc…
i learnt my duty is living my life risking my life,betting my life.
i have to accomplish the purpose of my life,i have to live this previous life risking my life because this time might be the last time of living as a human.
i might not be born as a human again in afterlife forever,after the death of me at this previous life.so i live my life risking my life to accomplish the purpose of this previous life.
i try everything on this earth.i want to know everything.i choose to die as soon as i did everything on this earth.
this life might be the last time of my soul being a human in the chain of the samsara of my soul.
i wonder what i would be in after life.
what i learnt is i have to live my life always risking my life.
i abhor and disbelieve invisible things like the love or the friendship or the bonds.
i believe the theory and the logic.
what i learnt is this moment never comes back again.
this diary is only for me.
fortunately I was born without the disability,with 5 parts.i was born in the perfect form.my mother had a miscarriage before I was born.i haven't seen her grave yet.
I'm a student in the elementary school.
some people laugh at disabled people.
they are living to fulfill the purpose of their life.people who laugh at them have to repeat the cycle of the reincarnation till they purify the mind.
I wish people like that suffer in the hell forever.
they have to atone for a sin in the after life.
they have to repeat the cycle.
does the soul really exist?
I want to do everything on the earth by the death.
why I was born as a human in the year I was born?what was I in the former life?
karma definitely comes back around for what ive done.
silence is golden.
everything is made of the elementary particles.
I read all books on the earth.
I want to know everything of the universe.
I want to be a budda in this life because I don't want to repeat the same cycle again,i want to finish the cycle at this time.why I was born as a human is to realise the meaning of living and the life in the universe.
I stuff the information of this world asap and research the universe in the university.after the graduation saving money,i go around the world for yrs.
I accomplish the purpose of my life.
I just want to know the universe with this solar system consists from the elementary particles till I die.
I do literally anything to know this world,the truth.i do anything for that.
i'm one of elementary particles of this whole universe.
i just want to know the universe as much as i can till my life expectance ends in near future.
sadly i'm in a lot of karma for what i've done, the lust killing when i was 3-4yrs old and 9yrs old,whose victim is the ants,the pill-bug,the snake,the tree frog.
i'm wondering how much karma returns to me,or has it already finished?
everything on this earth is made of the elementary particles.
the human and the lives i killed are equal.
if i were them i must have been dying in the agony.
i hate myself so much.i'm sorry.
i don't budge an inch till i get attacked physically.that's the line.i attack that object physically at that moment.
not to die,i pay a full attention not to be killed because the person next to me might be the lust killer.
…still,the silence is golden.(￣ー￣)………still, keeping silent suits best to me.
i want to redo my life all over again to research about the elementary particles.
i was suddenly beaten up by the stranger when i was 9 yrs old.i could kill that person as a self-defense.i was a fool that i didn't realise it.i think my father had to tell me that but my patents are the human who is far from the science.they judge the world with the world of their head.
…that time if the chronological scientific tables were in my hand,i'd have gone to MIT.